as I begin
to sink into this fate that I have tried so hard to tread you sit with your
magazines your cigarettes your apathy as we continue downward into lukewarm
discontent descending side by side as retrospect and time devour our thoughts
and our long nights with such civilized but brutal taste in suffering and self
disgrace your disappointment paints your eyes a darker shade of brown and your
poor excuses reek of such expensive wine while my replies of cowardice get
molded into forgiveness for everything you said and everything you did I have
failed to forgive you for either I tried but I failed to forgive any aspects of
either fairweathered friend how could these eyes ever forget those lustful
nights seeing your lips pressed against theirs I tried to forget I tried but failed
I begin to sink into this fate that I have tried so hard to tread because
apparently I’m much too dense your much too tired and oh so stressed ignoring
all these words that I am struggling to say so put down your pill bottles put
down your glass of wine put down all of your magazines and look me in the eye
and tell me that your happy tell me this is what you wanted from me because
it’s everything I have and everything I can afford such curteous envy I tried
but I failed to forgive any aspects of either she never said she wants it all I
bet she does I bet she does
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